the new term for farting is butt boxing.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
