He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
