i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Randomize
