I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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