omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
