Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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