Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
