Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
