I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
