how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
