Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
