Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
