My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
