New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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