just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
