glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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