i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
