He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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