Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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