I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
please come you make the beer taste better
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Is Oprah even human
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
