we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
