whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Are my feet made of real feet?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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