she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
