Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
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