i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Randomize
