Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
