Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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