come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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