carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Even the bartender felt bad for me
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
