I wish I only lived at night.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Randomize
