Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
