There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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