i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
