she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
