Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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