i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Semen is not good for contacts.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
