I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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