Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
