I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
