Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
You left your phone here
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