Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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