I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
