If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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