I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
