we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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