My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
