I hope mine doesn't look like that
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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