Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Randomize
