She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize
