I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
