We're like a lot better than the average bears
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
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